The Exile

Hogwarts Academy may be a figment of authoress J.K. Rowling's imagination, but there is no doubting the magical powers of Emma Watson when it comes to bewitching all you upskirt fans out there. The Exile's stat-porn has been very satisfying ever since we published the first Hermione Granger upskirt photo last week. This suggests that another look at her upskirt charms is in order.

If you enjoyed my memories of "Good-Arse" Higgins the other day, then you will just love this video. Just click to start and then sit back and prepare to piss yourself laughing. I have no idea who Fartman is, but the man is a star!

Hands up all those who remember Paretner from way back in February. Hmm, not a one of you... OK, Paretner is a pilot's squeeze who got annoyed because this blog sang the praises of the luscious Stephanie, the stripping French air hostess who was flashing her knockers all over the web. So annoyed was she that she actually wrote to me to express her displeasure - which gave me an extra laugh when I saw the e-mail signature had been rendered as "Paretner of a Pilot".

God knows what she would have said had the Ellen Simonetti photos been on this blog then, because that makes at least two air hostesses who like to flaunt their assets. Anyway, I suspected that what was getting Paretner's goat was the thought that her pilot might be encouraging an air stewardess to strip just as Stephanie's pilots had with her. Or taking photos of her as a pilot had with the lovely Ellen. Or was just amusing himself after a long-haul by giving a long poke to a nice little air hostess - maybe one just like the girl pictured on the left. (If you are an air stewardess upskirt fan, just click on the image to enlarge to full size.)

Paretner seems to be suffering from the same insecurities today as she was back in February, at least if this posting is anything to go by. In fact, she seems to want to get the retaliation in first - just in case he is providing extra-curricular training of the horizontal kind to his air stewardesses.

Paretner, my sweet, you must calm down. I am sure that your man is more or less faithful. At least when he is with you.

People, you really would need a heart of stone not to laugh out loud at the bimbos of this world and their insecurities.

Update, 2.15pm:

Little Paretner has changed the second posting linked to above and made it into one about your friendly Exile. Thanks, darlin', and it is nice to know that I really do get under the skin of aspirational types like you.

Folks this is the lovely Emma Watson, who plays Hermione Granger in the Harry Potter series. What can we say about this careless young lady, as she flashes the old upskirt like that? People might think that she did it on purpose just to get noticed. OK, Emma, it worked. Chaps, you know the drill: click on the images to enlarge them.

See you next week!

OK, you men, these are the last of the Royal Ascot upskirt photos that I have - unless someone wants to send some more. The first two photos of the lady that I have dubbed Madam Saggy-Arse can be seen here, and there is another Royal Ascot upskirt shot of a much nicer bit of talent on display here.

Information reaching your friendly Exile seems to confirm the tale that madam is a solicitor, and based out of the north-east of England - a Geordie, in other words. One correspondent tells me that her name is Leanne, but I have no confirmation of that. If anyone has any more details or photos, please get in touch.

A blogging man cannot live by politics alone, and a good dose of sleaze is needed to keep the hit counter spinning...

Yet more Royal Arsecot upskirts for your viewing pleasure...


God knows who this bird is. The guy who sent me the photos reckons that she is a lawyer. Let's just say that The Exile has his doubts, but even though she is a bit saggy-arsed, readers are invited to enjoy the show.


You know the rules by now: click to enlarge, lads, click to enlarge.



Yet more photos of Madam Saggy-Arse can be seen here.

Your friendly Exile, bringing pleasure to the multitude and giving up a bit of his weekend to bring you this nice photo from Royal Arsecot.

Click to enlarge, chaps. The photo that is. . .

Is it my imagination or is this bird seriously tasty? I was just sitting here, watching the Gif file run... And run... And run again, when I thought that I should share it with you.

So what do you think? Fit as a butcher's dog or not? Give it one or pass the sick bag?

Just sit back and let your one-eyed friend decide for you.

Sorry to say that I can't find any nude photos of Ashley Alexandra Dupre, the 22 year old girl who charged $1,000 an hour for sex, and who is credited with forcing the resignation of New York Governor Eliot Spitzer.

What I can report is that she is also a singer, and you can hear her songs at Arnie Street. A few short hours ago they were available as a free download, but now the price has reached 98c a track.

Check out some more photos of the lady here. On her back or in the recording studio, this girl is clearly going places.

Click to enlarge

What do we have here? Another tasty bit of airline talent. This nice young (semi) stripping stewardess is called Ellen Simonetti and she was fired by Delta Airlines back in 2004 for having photos like this taken when she was in her uniform. Maybe she should have taken it off first?

Since that unhappy incident occurred, the six foot Texan has written a book about her experiences with Delta and at the time of writing she seems to be whooping it up in France. Has she met Stephanie, the genuine stripping stewardess? We await further news with baited breath.

You want to see some more of Ellen? Here you go:

So I went trotting around the world o' blogs to see how the competition was handling the Stephanie story when I found this site, run by a woman who lives over the brush with a pilot. I was rather amused with the hysterical screed that she had posted, but contented myself with a fairly brief comment of my own before leaving.

I had quite forgotten the blog's existence until I fell out of bed the next afternoon to find a mail that had the signature "Paretner (sic) of A Pilot" in my in-box. Needless to say, Paretner was also that blog's owner:

What can I say? Sixty thousand quid and all he can get is some bimbo who can't spell. Not only that but she can't create an argument. First she posited that the pilot would lose his job, but then she went on to say that if the airline still existed "there would have been hell to pay".

Yes, dear, but the whole point is that it doesn't, does it? She there won't be anything to pay.

Not that there would have been, anyway. The other day a hostess lost a bet with her pilot and paid the forfeit by running through part of the terminal in her no doubt expensive underwear. These things do happen, don't they? Especially after long-haul flights when everyone is tired and wants to relax. I imagine that invitations to the pilot's hotel suite are much desired by nice young girls who are half his age...

I also suspect that this is the reason for Paretner's angst. Especially since she is not married to him and has no protection under law should he ever get bored with her.

Not that he will of course. Perish the thought...

Who is Stephanie, the stripping air hostess, that everyone and his brother is talking about?

I've done an update on what we know about her over at The Money Blog, so why not go and take a look?

In a move that will certainly anger many of her admirers, YouTube have started censoring Stephanie the stripping stewardess. The first video can only be uploaded minus the last few seconds - given that those seconds include shots of Stephanie's breasts it looks as if YouTube are making a boob with that policy. To make matters worse the second video is being banned as quickly as people upload it.

The two stripping air hostess videos are still available at other sites, which is why you can watch it here and at The Money Blog, but that is not the point. Just what do YouTube think that they are playing at?

Update, 6-Feb-2008: This is fucking weird - I posted one of my videos and now it seems to have vanished. If I find it again then rest assured that it will reappear.

Update: Her name is Stephanie and she has a new and even better video out!

Click to enlarge.

Girls, here's a tip. If you are going to give your man a wafty crank whilst you are driving the car, please remember that traffic lights tend to come with CCTV cameras installed these days.

This has been a public service announcement from The Exile who will be back next week.

Click to enlarge

Lock up your daughters! Forbid your wives to leave the house! Who knows if he may be heading to your part of the world?

Men hide their heads in shame at the mere mention of this man's name, and as you can see in the photo, women bow down as he passes. He is the greatest cocksmith who ever dipped a wick. This hero has shafted every porn starlet in a career going back over thirty years.

Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Ron Jeremy is going on his holidays.

Click to enlarge.

Michelle Marsh became a heroine when she darted into a blazing building to rescue two puppies that were trapped inside. Here she is shown clutching them to her chest as she takes them to safety.

The cause of the blaze is still unknown. A fire brigade spokesman said: "There is something running down my leg and I don't think it's sweat."

Police wish to interview Michelle Marsh very soon. "We want her to come.... And have her particulars taken down," said their spokesman.

Amy Fisher: the press called her the Long Island Lolita when she took a pistol and opened fire on her lover's wife. Well, she's out of the slammer and back to doing what she does best

The full 50 minute home made sex video featuring the lovely Amy is now available.


All sucking and all fucking!